"What the heck is your problem," asks Wile E. in response to the cracker yelling HBO words at him. "Alls I'm doin is standing here, minding my own business, looking for that rascally Road Runner. Why all the noise?"
One day last week, after our walkies, the cracker refused to come inside. It's not like him to do that, unless there's a fly in the house. This time though, apparently he had work to do. When I sat down to lunch, he raised the alert from orange to red, going full-on cracker-insane alert mode at the dog fence, about 50 feet from the dog gate. I guess this is what happens when you don't use the trails in a while, interlopers move in. Everyone has their opinions on coyotes, but I happen to think they are beautiful, albeit very dangerous to domestic dogs.
The cracker's all, "You're my problem dude. This is my property. This home is my home and the food in it is my food and we don't share with the likes of woo!" (I need to have a talk with the cracker about the word "my" in terms of home and food.)
Sigh. His heart is in the right place, as discriminate and rude as he is. Of course we would never encourage wild life to interact with us. Ever. Which is why I'm happy to have the cracker be as uncouth and impolite as he wants when wild life are near the house. In fact, it really bothers me to see all sorts of videos on social media of people interacting with deer, antelope, foxes, bears, etc. It's unfair to the animal and other animals who may be taken in by well-intentioned, but uneducated people. I understand rescuing orphan wild life, but I don't agree with raising wild life in a domestic home. And promoting that kind of thing on social media, such as the bear who lives with a family or a deer that's been raised by people (eventually was shot by police because it broke the rules for that state on keeping wildlife as a domestic pet), just breaks my heart. I'm not a fan of anyone who raises a wild animal and blogs or promotes it. Nor am I a fan of breeding dogs with wolves or raising a true wolf. It sends a dangerous message to naive minds who think they can do it too, and in the end, the animal usually suffers, by doing something that damages a family member or the property or is taken away and killed for violating wildlife rules in that state. All wild life is necessary to the ecosystem and we have no business disrupting that system. When it comes to wild life, I feel it should be observed but untouched by humans as much as possible.
So, I've been avoiding the trails for a few reasons. First, they are steep and hard and suck when I'm weak and tired. Secondly, the last time I used them they were overrun with leaf liter and the pasture wasn't cut yet. I came home with two ticks on my new shoes (not yet sprayed with Permetherin). We've since had the pasture mowed and a few weeks later, the trails were blown. So they can now be reclaimed by Loki and Juno and will be tick-free and safe.
So look out Wile E! The cracker and the criminal are going to be marking all over your scent marks on our trails to remind you to keep your distance!
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"Your project is guaranteed to meet superior Siberian standards or I will fatally masticate it. You have my "woo" on that!"
"I keep your project safe from crows, coyotes, and flies. I prefer to be paid in salmon treats and tennis balls."
"I manage the treat jar & the staff's daily payroll of cookies and bones. The staff is excellent at math and let me know when I come up short."