It's hard to believe that such an innocent face can hide years of criminal activities! She's destroyed countless Danskos (8 pairs), flip-flops (5 pairs), purses (2), mail, catalogs and books (9). She's overturned numerous trash cans, torn through toilet paper rolls, crunched at least 3 pairs of eye glasses. She's chewed up packets of dental floss, two of my yoga blocks and took a bite out of one of my yoga mats. She even shredded some of my yoga pants. She has an appetite for blue masking tape so much that we have to keep it under lock and key. She's also torn up several pillows and cardboard boxes. Her worst crimes were destroying my passport and my Mini Cooper. Yes, she ate my Mini Cooper. And yet, this criminal roams freely, gets a free lunch and reigns Princess. What can I say? The justice system is weak in our house.
No cash for the treat jar but you'd like to show the love? No problem! Connect with me on LinkedIn and endorse my creative writing skills. Thanks for the love!
"Your project is guaranteed to meet superior Siberian standards or I will fatally masticate it. You have my "woo" on that!"
"I keep your project safe from crows, coyotes, and flies. I prefer to be paid in salmon treats and tennis balls."
"I manage the treat jar & the staff's daily payroll of cookies and bones. The staff is excellent at math and let me know when I come up short."