We can't find a crate tall enough for Loki's ears. Pet relocation services tell us that an airline crate should be 4" taller than your dog's head and 4" longer than his body. While that's all fine and dandy, nobody gave us details on how to find a crate for a dog with gynormous ears. It's likely we'll have to have a crate modified or one specially made for him.
Meanwhile, Mr. Wild Dingo tries to help Loki get over his fear of crates.
"What kind of treat did Pop get to go in there?"
"Hey Princess, is this a circus car? How many clowns can we fit in this thing?"
"You're the only clown around here Big Boy."
"No barbarians allowed inside."
"Pop did you get a liver treat to come in here? Do you find they give you gas?"
"It's a good thing that crate is heavily ventilated Pop. If you catch my drift."
"Look Princess! Liver treats mysteriously appeared in the crate of doom!"
"Now if I could just figure out how to get the liver treats out of the dreaded crate of doom. Hmm. Must think."
"Move out of the way Big Boy and let me show you how it's done."
"You just go in, clean up the treats and check for more."
"And that's how it's done."
"Wow! You make it look so simple Princess. Let me try!"
"Hmmm. Now how did you do that again?"
"Now's a good time for Pop's 9.5 sized flip-flop to finish the job. It's a darn shame the shoe gnomes keep eating them."
The next morning, Loki, still unable to commit his whole body to the inside of a crate, discovers the joys of being limber.
"Must. Not. Let. Back. Feet. Inside!"
No cash for the treat jar but you'd like to show the love? No problem! Connect with me on LinkedIn and endorse my creative writing skills. Thanks for the love!
"Your project is guaranteed to meet superior Siberian standards or I will fatally masticate it. You have my "woo" on that!"
"I keep your project safe from crows, coyotes, and flies. I prefer to be paid in salmon treats and tennis balls."
"I manage the treat jar & the staff's daily payroll of cookies and bones. The staff is excellent at math and let me know when I come up short."