Alert readers will note a new feature in the right side bar: The Dansko Betting Pool. The Betting Pool is now open to take bets on the number of days my Dansko shoes survive. The house (me) bets that shoes will last for 180 days or more. If they don't make it to that fateful day, then the person with the number closest to the day that the shoes bite the dust will win the bet. The winner will receive a package of the finest Swiss chocolate I can find. And let Mr. Wild Dingo tell you that I'm quite the connoisseur of chocolate. It won't be cheap and it won't be lacking in variety or quantity.
"You'd be a fool not to bet against the house!"
Here is a short list of Siberian Masticatory wins in the last 3 years that are in favor of the player's odds:
|Opponent||Number of Wins|
|Mini Cooper Car||1 NB: an expensive repair raises it to the 10th power|
|Hiking Shoes||1 NB: First pair purchased April 2010. Time of Death: May 2010. Second Pair bought May 2010. Still Alive|
|Passport||1 NB: Again counts as higher due to the importance of item.|
|Danskos||5 NB: Last 2 pairs purchased October 2009. Time of Death: August 2010.|
|Outdoor Garden Shoes||2|
|Trash can contents:||10? 20? I just can’t count that high.|
I call this the short list because if I were to post every mastication the Sibe has completed in the last three years, I wouldn't be posting about any other subject. For example, below is another, unpublicized mastication the day she destroyed Rome. Notice the Roman mastications are in the background but the Ikea mastication was not mentioned in that post.
"I try to be helpful around the house, pre-open some of these Ikea boxes. And this is the thanks I get?"
So with only about 1/4 of Juno's mastications published in the last three years, it looks like the odds are in your favor to bet and bet early. You can't win if you don't play!
Hint: to analyze the odds in depth before placing your bets, be sure to study the history of Juno's mastications.
Update: Day Counting begins from 10/18/2020, the day the shoes arrived.
No cash for the treat jar but you'd like to show the love? No problem! Connect with me on LinkedIn and endorse my creative writing skills. Thanks for the love!
"Your project is guaranteed to meet superior Siberian standards or I will fatally masticate it. You have my "woo" on that!"
"I keep your project safe from crows, coyotes, and flies. I prefer to be paid in salmon treats and tennis balls."
"I manage the treat jar & the staff's daily payroll of cookies and bones. The staff is excellent at math and let me know when I come up short."