Back to Forward

October 18, 2018

Back to Forward

October 18, 2018
Posted in: Lyme Disease | Reading Time: 3 minutes

Wild Dingo | writer | designer | storyteller

Once upon a time, there was a boy who married a girl who worked for herself. This was an attractive feature to the boy as he was a bit older than girl. It meant that he could potentially retire early on her income. It was a good plan. Even the girl thought so because she enjoyed her work.  Then the universe had a full-belly laugh. The girl got gravely sick and retired early. Not knowing what to do next, the boy and girl moved to Switzerland for a few years, because that's what people do when they are too young to retire but too sick to work. Oh, readers! There's only so many sentences I can write about myself in the third person. Self-narratives can be healthy up to a point. Then it's just creepy.

When I decided to return to work, I knew I would have to overhaul this blog. It once served as my business contact and it will again. But coming back from Lyme disease is a bit like waking up from a coma. With the brain fog now clear, information that I haven't been able to process in the last 5 years is suddenly flowing into my brain faster than I can deal with it. This can be quite uncomfortable, as waking up from Lyme disease is a bit of an ego-rebirth. Who are you now? What do you want to do?  How are you going to do it?  Why do you want to do it? These questions can be difficult to address, especially in this ever-increasing savagery of the political environment. Let me tell you readers, there is never "going back" to a life after Lyme disease.  You only go forward. You change. Change is hard.

One of the things I discovered as I embarked on my web redesign is that I don't want to return to my old job as it would definitely not be as challenging. Instead I took a step back and enrolled in courses that interest me and have been in school ever since. I don't know how long I'll be in school but I have taken on some fun ghost writing projects in the mean time and we'll see how it goes from there. All that anxiety of who I am after Lyme disease suddenly disappears when I'm in school. To me, learning environments are nurturing. School is always a good place to begin your self-discovery. It's especially a great place to escape the unabashed cruelty of politics.

Change is not just difficult for the individual, but also difficult for those around her. Much to his chagrin, Mr. Wild Dingo had to embrace giving up four-course dinners and entertainment to support my ego growth spurt. I found my old "business" license plate in the shop attic. I dusted it off and propped it up in the office which gave Mr. Wild Dingo a big smile. Maybe he won't get fancy dinners, but at least he'll have an income to support his European wine habit in retirement. Now that's something to smile about.

Ain't Too Proud to Beg

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6 comments on “Back to Forward”

  1. We wish you could see the BIG smiles on all of our faces - this is just the post we have hoped for so long to see - we are so happy for you to be doing so well!!!

    Woos - Lightning, Misty, and Timber

  2. hello wild dingo its dennis the vizsla dog hay i am so glad to heer that yoo ar dooing wel and tayking sum intresting korses!!! i am lukking forward to heering abowt all the noo stuf wot yoo ar going to lern and do!!! ok bye

  3. I can't believe what you said about the music in your head! In 2015 my brain was a record player. I'm 64 and was a child of the sixties so ALL the tunes from then were flooding thru my brain, words, pitch, beat everything was playing. Over the course of the next 5 years without diagnosis the Lyme moved everywhere with a nasty co-infection. I'm still fighting but the antibiotics are helping my brain but that's it. Want to die but have four beautiful adult children to live for. On disability. Early retirement. Broke and homeless! Yes Lyme is hell.

  4. You got better?! How? I'm getting worse. But there is no place here to be treated, although I've been told there is no treatment.

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