writer, warrior, whack-a-doodle

If Looks Could Kill

If Looks Could Kill

March 14, 2011
Posted in: Dogs | Reading Time: 2 minutes

Post Traumatic Siberian Stare otherwise known as Post Bath Stink-Eye.

"I'm so documenting this in my memoires of the abuse and traumas I'm subjected to."

One of the nice things about Siberians is that they rarely need baths. They just never get dirty or if they do, the mud and dirt sort of just falls off them. Not having to bathe Juno too much makes up for the twice annual coat blowing and the never-ending army of Siberian dust bunnies collecting on the floors. Usually twice per year I give them both a bath. Even Loki doesn't need much bathing. He stays pretty clean too. Lately, we've been going for lots of off-leash forest walks where they plow through some muddy, stinky areas of the river banks. And Juno actually stunk.

So Saturday night's fun activity was bath night. Oh yeah. You can see how exciting life in Europe has been. Well, at least for the dogs.

Loki took his bath like a man, reluctant, but quiet. Juno? Her protests and dramatic cries for help could be heard throughout the neighborhood. The autobiography, "Siberian on the Edge: Bullied by a Formosan and Bathed by a Human," is due to hit bookstores this spring.

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16 comments on “If Looks Could Kill”

  1. Will be looking out for it on the shelves! I predict and Nobel in Literature coming up. Good for you Juno, tell them how indignant you feel about a bath. Gah! But you got off lucky. Momma-1 is obsessed with me smelling nice. She says I have BO. I DO NOT! I smell absolutely delicious and ripe. It's those stupid baths that give me BO. =(


  2. I am glad the neighbors didn't call you in when they heard the howls of horror from Miss Juno. Momma put the carpet stink down yesterday and now I smell all flowery just from laying on the rug. Ick.


  3. wooo Juno I so understand, these awful humans that do this to us, when will they learn. Sounds like im just like you on the bath front, crying and screaming but nobody ever comes to my help. Best thing you can do, go find some nice mud, horse poo, even better fox poo or dead animal and have a real good roll in it 🙂

  4. Same here, we get to go to the groomer 2-3 times a year, but it is usually more for the blowing of the coat with their powerful blowers than the bath itself. We get the paw dunking or toweling if the paws are really muddy - especially the claws that get caked with mud. The Momster says she is glad she doesn't have to see that stink eye.

    Woos ~ Phantom, Thunder, and Ciara

  5. Juno, we had our first trauma, erm, spa day of the spring last Friday, and now we're totally nekkid. More comfortable, and we still have our floofy tails, but otherwise, totally nekkid. And even worse, Mom has been posting nekkid pictures of us on the interwebs! Needless to say, we are collecting all of this scarring information so when we have to visit a psychiatrist due to Post Traumatic Spa Stress Syndrome (recognized by wild barking at nothing, sleepless nights, and flopping on top of Mom when she's trying to 'work') there will be no question as to our diagnosis. 😉

    *kissey face*
    -Fiona and Abby the Hippobottomus

    Note from Mom: the girls actually didn't give me the stink-eye. Yes, they were happy to see me when I picked them up at the groomer, but no stink-eye. And that's your Saturday night entertainment, huh? Oh yeah, you're in Switzerland; the sidewalks are rolled up promptly at 6pm. Bathe the dogs, kill the plants - I guess you've got to find your entertainment somewhere, huh? 😀

  6. LOL! That's how mine are. Jackal takes it quietly, but Storm howls and cries the whole time. Sibes are such drama queens. 🙂 I think the reason they don't get dirty is because they recycle their coat weekly haha!! I have the Siberian Fur Bunnies too along my baseboards. Storm also cleans herself off like a cat if she gets dirty so that helps. Jackal needs bathed more often than her because he gets that distinctive Beagle smell. 🙂 Cute picture btw.

  7. Ha ha ha! I can just imagine! I wish Morgan were wash and wear, but I see many dates with the hose before she comes back in the house this Spring. She looks at a mud puddle and has mudballs on her belly! Juno, I still think you've got pretty sweet deal where you are, but that's a lousy Saturday night.

  8. We get bath's about once a year to help with our coat blowing. I hate it and always make sure to give the humans (it takes two of them to keep all 129 pounds of me in the tub) a good workout for subjecting me to such horror. Thank goodness Khady likes to hang out in the bathroom with me to keep me company. Either that, or she's really worried they are actually torturing me and she wants to be there to attack them if necessary.

    Then, like the little suck-up puppy she is, she likes getting a bath!


  9. Good thing your bath was on Saturday, or they'd be blaming your yowling for the recent earthquake and tsunami! Doggie baths are one of the many things mama has been happy to delegate in her declining years. So we just associate her with coming to spring us from the joint after the bath has been inflicted.

    Jed & Abby

  10. Hee! Hee! I don't get that look from Honey (she's more the mournful, long-suffering "Most Abused Dog" look) but the cats more than make up for it! Cats are experts at giving the Evil Eye! Lemon used to glare at me for hours after a bath - and since Muesli had her 1st bath last week, she's looking like she's picking up the same skill nicely - ha! ha!


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