"Don't blame me. I was just wrapping your present."
You all must think I'm staging this for some publicity. You know, bad publicity is better than no publicity. But I'm here to tell you, I lock my stuff up. She recently discovered how to open doors and drawers. And no, I can't and won't crate her. Besides ruining her teeth on both wire and plastic crates, I really hate the way they look in our main living areas. So we'll have to devise locks on the doors.
"It's not my fault I don't have opposable thumbs."
The other day, while I was sitting at my computer, she casually strolled into then out of the bathroom carrying a NexCare band aid box she found laying on the bathtub ledge. It always cracks me up to see the Sibe casually strolling around the house with contraband in her mouth. I laughed, softly told her "no" and she dropped it immediately. Because she was such an angel in front of me, I gave her something delicious to chew in its place.
But don't worry. I wasn't born yesterday. New anti-sibe systems are already underway.
No cash for the treat jar but you'd like to show the love? No problem! Connect with me on LinkedIn and endorse my creative writing skills. Thanks for the love!
"Your project is guaranteed to meet superior Siberian standards or I will fatally masticate it. You have my "woo" on that!"
"I keep your project safe from crows, coyotes, and flies. I prefer to be paid in salmon treats and tennis balls."
"I manage the treat jar & the staff's daily payroll of cookies and bones. The staff is excellent at math and let me know when I come up short."